I approach this article with the feeling that many good people will criticize me. I want to blow the cover off of something that is wrong, abusive, and anti-Christian, yet is regularly practiced even inside the walls of most of our churches and religious institutions. Oh yes, you will find it in homes and schools and businesses too. But I hope that, since it is so contrary to the very nature of God, we will at least recognize it and try to put a stop to it in church.
For those of you who don’t go to church, this may be the reason you don’t go. For those who do, I hope you will either point it out when you see it, or walk out in protest. Better to stay away from it, even if it means you stay home! I am neither joking nor exaggerating.
The subject I am talking about is called “manipulation.” It is a way of getting people to do what we want them to do even if they don’t really want to do it. We may think that it is the right thing for them to do, but it is still a wrongful act of control upon others. It is contrary to grace, incompatible with freedom, disrespectful of human dignity, and diametrically opposed to love.
I have included a few examples of manipulation that you may have heard somewhere at some time in your life:
“After all that the Lord has done for you, can’t you at least come back for the evening service?”
“ Don’t you want God to bless your finances? How can He if you don’t tithe?”
“ Send in all you can, and He will give you all you need!” (Oh, by the way- you’re giving to God, but make the check out to us, at our address!)
“Don’t you know your mother will be so proud of you if you come forward during the invitation?”
“Aren’t you ashamed that you didn’t bring more people?”
“God told me that you’re supposed to do this!”
“Our class hasn’t won the attendance banner all year. This is embarrassing!”
“ I talked to a man about his decision. He put it off for one more day, and got killed in a car wreck! It could happen to you, so don’t wait!”
“If you will promise to come back again tomorrow night, stand up!”
“We can’t be a hundred percent unless everybody gets here on time and studies the lesson and brings an offering!”
“They say that hell is a thousand times hotter than a furnace. Do you want to go there? Do you want others to go there? “
“Don’t you think God is ashamed of this old carpet, these bad lights, and this old building?”
“How many crowns of reward are you going to have if you don’t attend faithfully?”
I’m sure that you could add others to this list. Instead of joyful motivation, the appeal is to fear, or pride, or shame, or competition, or greed. The worst part of all of this crass manipulation in churches is that it hurts and abuses our most vulnerable and trusting people. They even get the idea that God endorses manipulation, when in fact He hates it. The final result is a choice between two possibilities. Either they themselves learn to play the game and manipulate others, or they just become discouraged with the whole place, and never come back.
Where manipulation runs unchecked and without repentance, I recommend the latter.
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